secrets.

Some secrets are too precious to keep to yourself.
And some? You pretend you don't have it.
You hide every inch of the stories inside your heart and mind.
But when it starts to whisper and underneath your anger
It starts to whistle out of your mouth
Everything goes wrong
And you'll create just another lie to defend yourself.
From what is worth hiding it for.

Truth be told,
Everything has never been clean from lies.
Another lie to hide the other lie.
You wish for it to just disappear
But it will never ever leave you free.

The guilt
The burden you must carry
You're on your own figuring how to fix things out.

Well well
That's the secret about secrets.
Sometimes it's good and delighting
And other times, it kills.

-ASTRID M.K.S 13-

this is what i do when i have nothing to do.

Lots Of Pain, Still No Gain.

This is a nightmare

When you can't wake up and you're stuck 

When you don't even remember going to bed

Cause even when i open my eyes i feel blind

I wanna see what others can see

I wanna know how it feels to be happy

But the pain it doesn't stop

Even if i jump down a cliff and all the way i scream my lungs out

Even if i bleed like a waterfall and i let it flow forming the perfect red river

Even if i cry out loud and drown to die in my sea of tears

Even if i love you as long as i live, will it even matter?

Cause even though you know you mean the world to me, i'm still not part of yours.

Kata-katanya emang lebay banget, tapi ini mah gak based on my feelings, cuma iseng aja hahaha :x 

New Header

Another normal Sunday went okay and......... normal

I decided to make a new header, unlike other people who does things seriously and despite the satisfaction of trying and fighting also, they also get great results (just check out other blogs, they're all so awesome-_-) i made it half my heart and the header? it's okay cause after living in this body with this soul and this heart plus this brain for 13 years, one of the things i hate most about myself is this indescribable laziness, but who cares? this isn't a big deal it's just about a header :/

this was my header:

Chipsy~

it wasn't that bad wasn't it?
so the header i'm using right now is the one i created and it's not ugly but it's not good either.(faaaaaaaar from good)

The result depends on the effort;) This is just a work of an amateur

Who cares about the stupid header? care about the posts (omg as if my posts are good -_-)
Enjoy my blog :);)

Iseng.

Menerawang jauh ke dunia yang kukarang

Di mana kau dan aku bersama

Kadang ku merasa terlalu kesepian

Dan ku ciptakan sahabat baru di angan

Karena kisah kau dan aku terlalu ku damba

Dan sulit untuk menerima kenyataan, kau jauh dari gapaian

Melupakan mu, menghapus sebagian dariku

Yang terlanjur percaya kau dan aku adalah satu

Kau biarkan aku percaya semua akan terjadi

Kau biarkan aku terus berharap pada yang tak pernah pasti

Apadaya aku terlanjur jatuh cinta?

Pada ide yang ku rencanakan telah lama

Kau tatap aku seakan semua tak pernah terjadi

Tapi kutetap dambakan tatapan mu itu

Sulit bagiku membenci apa yang aku inginkan

Apa yang sudah terlalu lama kudambakan

Semakin kau menjauh semakin kencang teriakanku

Terlalu sulit untukku melepas mu

Yang tak pernah benar-benar di genggaman ku

Tapi semua terasa begitu nyata

Namun sekarang melihat kau dan dia

Aku hanya bayangan pudar di antara berjuta

Di mata mu hanya ada bayangan dia

Padahal dahulu ku kira hanya ada pantulanku di situ
Aku yakini kamu, di mataku tetap hanya ada sosok mu

Baru kusadari semua takan terjadi

Untuk kisah cinta yang indah harus ada yang mengalah

Kali ini, bukanlah aku tokoh utamanya

Kali ini adalah kau dan dia

Dan aku yang melangkah pergi, yang tersakiti

Mencoba membuat puisi cinta hahahaha gak banget asaan jarang sih gua bikin puisi kayak gini -__- udah yaaa sorry gaje

-Astrid-