Bored

She's young and is in the making of herself

She's this strong but really unstable person

She always tries to reach the impossible

She always tries to see the invisible

She always tries to seek for the none existing

Yes, she tries too hard

Her paranoia of her pride being ruined

Often ruins everything good

Her fear of being judged 

Often screams out for attention

She doesn't know what's it like to be "yourself"

Cause she doesn't know who she really is,

Yet

She's insecure and thinks she's insane 

That drives her crazy and see red 

But deep inside she knows she's fine

She's just going through this weird phrase

What's it called? Teenage years?

                                                                                                -Astrid, 14 tahun-

Yup.

Sometimes you're too busy judging other people that somewhere along the scoring you lost your own identity
                                                                                                              -Astrid M. K. S-

It's My Opinion and It's The Fact

When you did a really bad thing as bad as what you did, it's between
1) you're a total heartless person
    or;
2) you're a total brainless person

in your case, you're a combination of both.
   

secrets.

Some secrets are too precious to keep to yourself.
And some? You pretend you don't have it.
You hide every inch of the stories inside your heart and mind.
But when it starts to whisper and underneath your anger
It starts to whistle out of your mouth
Everything goes wrong
And you'll create just another lie to defend yourself.
From what is worth hiding it for.

Truth be told,
Everything has never been clean from lies.
Another lie to hide the other lie.
You wish for it to just disappear
But it will never ever leave you free.

The guilt
The burden you must carry
You're on your own figuring how to fix things out.

Well well
That's the secret about secrets.
Sometimes it's good and delighting
And other times, it kills.

-ASTRID M.K.S 13-

this is what i do when i have nothing to do.

Lots Of Pain, Still No Gain.

This is a nightmare

When you can't wake up and you're stuck 

When you don't even remember going to bed

Cause even when i open my eyes i feel blind

I wanna see what others can see

I wanna know how it feels to be happy

But the pain it doesn't stop

Even if i jump down a cliff and all the way i scream my lungs out

Even if i bleed like a waterfall and i let it flow forming the perfect red river

Even if i cry out loud and drown to die in my sea of tears

Even if i love you as long as i live, will it even matter?

Cause even though you know you mean the world to me, i'm still not part of yours.

Kata-katanya emang lebay banget, tapi ini mah gak based on my feelings, cuma iseng aja hahaha :x